Walking with Ralph

Before Ralphie and I came to Flint, Michigan, Ralphie and I spent the summer of 2020 in Schererville, Indiana.  My daughter was finishing up High School and would soon be off to college in the fall of 2020.  I had proposed to my employer to develop some business back in Michigan and the idea was approved.  When fall came, I would put my place up for sale and move back to Michigan to be near the family that I had moved away from in 1995.  

While in Schererville, I had a townhome with an awesome little bike trail that ran behind it.  Ralph and I would walk the trail twice a day, and encountered a great diversity of people and we would greet most everyone. I found it curious that the least friendly of those on the trail was the people most like me; 50 something plus white males.  In the wake of the social unrest and chaos that we were currently experiencing, it seemed like those with the most to be grateful and happy for, were the ones that were the most annoyed by my attempts to say hello or interact.  As much as I was irritated by the interactions or lack there of with others, Ralph was unfazed.  It was that trail where Ralphie taught me that I could let the grumblers affect me and possibly discourage us from trying to spread a little love on our trail, or we could simply pay them no mind and look forward to our next positive encounter.  I wasn't alone in the reception of stern looks or half hearted hellos, Ralphie was by my side.  The difference was our reaction.  Mine was emotional and still today……thought.  Our thoughts are energy consumers, they take energy, and I was literally giving energy to unwanted greetings…..even after the fact and I guess even today.   Ralph?, he had stuff to do.  Dogs are busy doing dog things and have no time for negative self assesments to permeate their being.

I was amazed at the resillence of Ralph.  We would continue our walk and he would continue our journey and gave zero energy to what in my mind was a negative encounter.  His happy walk would continue regardless of how the previous interaction would go. Smiles and frowns were treated the same and we had places to go and Ralph seemed to say to me, "dont get too high or too low regarding interactions with others, we can't take on their issues, we have too much to see and do."  It was these moments that I actually felt like I could see God in my dog.  It was these interactions that I always felt like a was in the presence of greatness.  The way that Ralph carried himself with grace was admirable.  My dear friend Ralph had a better fundemental grasp of what would be an appropriate acceptance of how to interpret and integrate the feedback cues from your surroundings.

It was that trail where my first lessons were taught.  I knew we had something special, I would have no idea just how much my fuzzy friend would have to teach me.  I looked forward to our walks.  On one occasion, I was on the phone and completely detached from our walk and the people that we would pass.  I remember thinking after that walk how we had so much love and happiness to share with the people of this world and if we allowed anyone to prevent us from sharing that, well that would be on us.  I think we can all identify those "energy vampires," those who consume the time and energy of others with the same issues over and over.  The game of victim and rescuer was one that I was familiar with and was becomeing unveiled.  The attemps of the rescuer to allow one person to dominate their attention over and over without any progress in growth or their situation comes at the expense of vast amounts of others who could be transformed.  The sharing of love with one soul is only as successful as their ability to accept it.  

There are no shortage of people in this world who will demand and dominate your attention and joy.  These individuals will never be satified with your efforts.  They have an insatiable thirst for taking.  Your attempts to satisfy those will be at the expense of blessing others who may be in such a need that they are open to allow any and all love pour in.  I can remember feeling like I had let my trail friends down during the time I spent on the phone.  I also felt like I had cheated Ralph, these were our times, and allowing anyone to take anything away from the experience was shameful.  I guess those walks on that trail were a type of mindfullness exercise, paying attention to my world, my motivations, my thoughts and emotions.  

The result was the idea that "walking with Ralph," was more than taking him out to poo or pee.  These walks, if done properly, could align me with what I was truely meant to be.  I felt like I was beginning to allow the genuine part of myself to be exposed.  The trick, I figured, would be to become comfortable letting that person out, I felt like I had "been" something else for so long that I wasn't really sure what or who that genuine person was.  As our walks progressed, I tried to stay dedicated to our time, where neither of us would impose our will or agenda on the other.

Looking back at this time, it was the perfection preparation for the next leg of our journey which would take us back home.